Plis Deh Jakarta!

After 8 years, the East Flood Canal is coming closer to reality. Has construction been started? Just a bit, but who knows, really. But the acquisition of land is 90% complete!

So if in average land acquisition goes forward at about 11% per year, we should be done with it by early 2010. Then the larger scale construction happens, who knows for how long, but for argument’s sake, 3 years. Therefore, we’ll start to have a relatively flood-free Jakarta by 2013!

Nice to have something to look forward to.

Jakartan drivers are notorious for their tenacity in finding a way to go forward in traffic, regardless of the vehicle used. Gasoline conservation is a must so a vehicle’s momentum must be maintained at all times, and usage of brakes must be avoided at all costs. These basic principles override everything else; stuff like traffic laws, safety, common sense and the like. Like people think about those things anyway.

An 7-ton illegal shipment of contraband has successfully been foiled, right where it would have been smuggled through Soekarno-Hatta International Airport. The shipment, divided into suitcases carried by several people on flights originating from Bangkok.

So, what evil commodity have we been saved from by the authorities?

Clothes.

So, the poor guys living in the Bungur area have their trash piling up, due to the fact the garbage trucks are late making their rounds. The Sanitation Agency says the trucks are delayed due to the floods blocking several roads to Bantar Gebang (the city dump, essentially).

So combine that with the floods bringing in trash to Jakarta, our city totally stinks!

Oh look at this headline! Heavy rains send more trash to Jakarta – apparently so. It is still really strange though; why would heavy rain bring a 20.000 cubic meters of trash? Did it come from the sky?

The sanitation department took 3 days and 43 truckloads to clean up the bulk of the mess at Kalibata Bridge, coming in at about 1.800 cubic meters, racing against the looming threat of more flooding. But what kind of flood – water, or trash?

I take pity to those security guards who are assigned to help manage the flow of traffic coming out of malls, or even guard pedestrian crossings. They’re not police, mind you, and everybody knows it – so the usual reverence reserved for police is hardly ever shown to them, when they are really only trying to help.

In comes my firsthand example: a security guard is assigned to guard the pedestrian crossing between Plaza Senayan and Senayan City. Since both malls are almost always packed, there is always a high volume of traffic between the two, whether it is cars or people.

The security guard manages to stop the traffic to let through a throng of people pass the pedestrian crossing, yet one motorcycle rider still tries to push through – even when a lot of people are already crossing the street. The security guards yells at the motorcycle rider and tries to push him back and block his way with his hand. So what happens? The motorcycle rider actually becomes angry and yells back, before speeding off, and all the while people are still crossing the road.

Perhaps he had a nature call. Considering that, perhaps a lot of drivers and motorcycle riders in Jakarta are under a constant call from nature hence having to forget everything else, even safety.

And thus the poor security guard asks to be rotated to another task, like going through people’s bags at the mall entrance.

Our beloved governor has said that Jakarta is ready for the peak of the floods anticipated in February. Early-warning systems and task forces have been set up for this purpose, and have supposedly worked for a flood along the Ciliwung earlier this month.

Yes, when the flood comes, we’ll be ready this time! Yeah yeah!

And yet, nothing is done trying to avoid the actual flood itself.

Bandara Soekarno-Hatta 11:00 AM: Mid-2002

i’m just arriving after long hour on plane from Seoul, where the city is soo well…. unlike Jakarta…
Here I am at the airport Lobby lookin’ for a cab…no time for resting at home… i have to get to Depok QUICK!!!

and there’s 1 taxi whose colour just look like Bluebird taxi (apparently, it is not…)

Driver: “Taxi boss?”
Me: “UI Depok… brape?” (depok. how much?) (since I know it’s hard to find taxi with proper argo-meter these days)
Driver: “120 rebu” (120 thousand rupiah)

and after tiresome bargaining, we closed the deal at 75 thousand
off we go…

on a bumpy yet speedy ride ON THE TOLL ROAD, my musing was “oookay… wrong cab”
after several near misses with several cars and busses we arrived at Pancoran flyover, where every normal driver should exit if we’re goin to depok
but not him… oh no

me: “bang… ke Depok bukannya keluar tadi?” (err didn’t we miss the exit already?)
driver: “tenaang dee… saya tau jalan pintas” (dont worry bro… i know a short cut)

and by saying “shortcut” he means “going to Depok thru Kramat Djati market” OMFG
me (musing): “dont worry.. he’s a little man.. i can take him mano on mano”

and then it happens
the taxi I’m riding got into contact and slid a parking small pick-up, which happened to have 3 elderly women unloading onions…
what did the driver do? did he run away feeling scared? did he stop and tackle the responsibility?
nope… he just drove away like nothing happened… oh dear Lord…

I look back… and of course.. the pick up is gaining speed upon us… WITH THE WOMEN IN THE BACK!! (i swear i can see their eyes filled with horror)
and they cut us off, easily
taxi driver suddenly looking back… i thought he wanted to go reverse and run away instead….

Driver: “ada apa yah mas?” (what’s going on here?) …. oh… that’s a question to me…
Me (Musing): “PALE LO ADA APA?”     (YOUR HEAD! THAT’S what goin ON!)
me (actual): “ga tau mas… mungkin mau nanya jalan.. liat tuh ngetuk2″ (I dont know… maybe he’s asking for direction… look he’s tapping your window atm<actually it’s more like banging your window>)

and unsuspectedly he open the window, i would of closed my eyes, but the next scene was too good to miss…

as soon as the window opened, a BIG hand about the size of a small tree pushed itself against the face of the driver (it is what we call.. punching)
and do you remember the dolls that when you punch it and it will bounce back to standing up position again?
I swear i saw same scenery after the guy driving the pick up managed to pull him outside his taxy

Pickup Guy (to me): “JANGAN IKUT CAMPUR LU!” (MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS) …
me: *raising thumbs and smile in horror*

sure…. when i need to go to Depok quickly and that guy is beating up my taxi driver.. it’s REALLY NOT MY BUSINESS!

after 5-10 mins of that massacre…(and the eldery women screaming “STOOOOP IT PLEAAAASSEEE!!!”)
the driver got into his seat.. and started the car…
and off we go…. with still reckless style of course…

here’s some randoms:

me: “Digebukin bang?” (got beaten up eh?)
driver: “Iye de… tapi tenang aja… udah saya tangkis kok… untung aja saya masih bisa nyimpen emosi..” (yes… but dont worry, i parry his attack, thank God i didn’t lose temper to that guy)

Riiiiiigghhtt

Finally arrive at Depok, gang Kober jalan Margonda Raya…

I paid the taxi and so here I am, waiting to cross busy Margonda…
Hey the police dude helped me cross the street… nice policeman…

arriving at the other side, suddenly i hear something.. like a car crash or something
looking back…

there’s the nice policeman’s motorcycle lying on the ground… and the taxi i have driven in drove away..
and next scene is the policeman chasing the taxi…

Great story submitted by Yogi Natasukma.

Jadi, anak-anak sekolah kan udah itungannya 2 minggu masuk lebih pagi, demi usaha mengurangi kemacetan… tapi, sebenernya ngefek nggak sih? Silakan isi survei di bawah, dan kalau ada komentar lain kasih komentar aja di artikel ini.

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Several PKS (Prosperous Justice Party) were named suspects in an alleged illegal politicl campaign rally. The event said to be a disguised campaign move was the long-march of PKS sympathizers from Bunderan HI to the US Embassy, numbering to around 200.000 people, protesting the attack of Israel on Gaza (which is still continuing today).

The party head reacted to this saying that the rally was a humanitarian rally to support Palestine, and is no way a political campaign.

Yes, and all those PKS flags and banners brought by the crowd just happened to be there.

For the record: Plis Deh Jakarta condemns the humanitarian atrocities occuring right now in Gaza, but also condemns random rocket attacks on innocent civilians.