Plis Deh Jakarta!

Dear political parties and representative candidates,

We here at Plis Deh Jakarta want to tell you some of our thoughts on a few points.

Things that will not get you elected:

• driving around in your VW Caravelle to visit poor areas for PR shots
• using facilities from taxpayer’s money to run your campaign (i.e. government car)
• being a virtual nobody. If people don’t know you, most likely they won’t vote for you, either. Placing a million posters of your face on every street won’t change that.

Things that has no relevance to you getting elected:

• getting a lot of people to ride cars, buses or motorcycles wearing the same t-shirt
• getting those people to ride around the city waving flags and creating traffic jams
• spending billions to gather those people in the city centre for speeches. Chances are the people there have already made up their mind on who to vote for, so the speeches are moot
• claiming family ties to a certain famous person, on the poster
• wearing a pici/kopiah on your campaign posters. 

Things that might get you elected:

• look good on those posters. No, forget about the picture with the lion, or the James Bond impersonation. Just look good.
• try to say what your mission is or what you represent on those posters. Putting on ‘Mohon Doa dan Dukungannya’ doesn’t really say anything.
• Go out door-to-door if need be. Who knows, it might even be more effective than spending billions on a 1-day political rally
• Make sure you have a clear, simple campaign message. Right know, we can’t tell the difference between the multitude of political parties

Things you really should think about rather than only about getting elected:

• clean, transparent governance
• equal rights and better welfare
• conserving the environment
• better public transportation systems
• cheaper internet!!

Sincerely,

Plis Deh Jakarta

Tangerang has agreed to allocate land for construction of a garbage processing site for Jakarta’s trash. So Tangerang will turn away couples looking for a place to have premarital sex and even women walking alone at night, but will accept trash.

The Tangerang authorities really know how to make their city comfortable, don’t they?

Plis Deh Jakarta extends its deepest sympathies and profound prayers to those who suffered from the leevee breach at Situ Gintung. We will post more info on rescue efforts and how you can help soon.

Today is Hari Raya Nyepi, where Balinese Hindus usually celebrate by self-reflection in silence – there can be no fires lit (and lights need to be kept low), no work, no entertainment and leisure, no travelling, and for some, no talking and eating at all. In effect, for one day, Bali shuts down.

Jakarta will stay noisy today thank you very much.

‘Pertama ditemukan di sini’ – berarti, sebelumnya bubur bebek ini belum pernah ditemukan manusia sebelumnya? Mungkin ada bubur bebek lain yang belum ditemukan.

In Bogor, not only the people work in shifts at some factories, the public transport minivans will too. Bogor has notoriously been a spectacle for traffic jams, for these green or blue minivans are practically everywhere, on any road and probably stopping to wait for passengers. To add to that, these minivans seem to forget that there are other cars using the road, because they stop anywhere – even the middle of the road – to get or disembark passengers. There’s even some sections of the town that are somehow allocated for a full 12-hour traffic jam for these minivans to wait for their passengers, eating up to three lanes and leaving only one lane passable for other cars.

A Bogor official was quoted “It won’t be minivans waiting for passengers anymore, but the other way around”. Makes you think – how did Bogor get so many minivans in the first place, for such a small town?

Two police officers were arrested for selling ecstasy; they claim they were instructed by three prosecutors to sell the contraband. Apparently, the pills sold were part of confiscated evidence in an ongoing case.

It’s kind of pointless being an officer of the law if you don’t uphold it yourself…

There are many controversies around the relatively new Buddha Bar, part of the Buddha Bar franchise. Some have said it to be ‘selective’ of clients, some students and religious groups have protested the blasphemy of the bar’s name, and now corruption watchdogs are looking into the strange fact that the building housing the bar was bought and renovated with taxpayer money, yet rented out to daughters of top officials. Now the bar is considering a name change, so I guess eventually it can keep servicing its preferred clientele with peace.

Um… all this fuss about a bar? The funny thing is, the Religious Affairs minister said if Buddha Bar was allowed to keep its name, it would prompt other bars to name themselves ‘Christian Bar’ or ‘Islam Bar’. Right.

A group of experts has stated that Jakarta needs planning supervision.

Really? You think? It’s too bad these experts aren’t helping the government do what they suggest… yet. Let’s hope they do, or else more ‘slap on a band-aid’ programs, like some sections of the Transjakarta busway, will happen; or the same roads will have the same potholes all over again at the same time of year, despite repeated repairs.