Plis Deh Jakarta!

So, Jl. Pangeran Antasari, one of the busiest roads in South Jakarta, is going to be made a one-way street. Problem is, the Jakarta city administration hasn’t figured out which way.

Really increases my level of confidence in their planning capabilities…

Today, I’d like to propose something: let’s make some sort of online petition, or Facebook page/group, or something, for Citizens Against Noisy And Useless Police Escorts. Well, the term ‘police escorts’ might technically be incorrect, but you get my drift.

Every day, whether in traffic jams or not, we meet a small entourage of vehicles – the smallest being one expensive sedan like a Camry or Mercedes-Benz, escorted by an all-black Nissan X-Trail with police lights on top and four mean-looking guys inside – trying to get you off the road with their sirens so they can pass. Even when the roads are obviously jammed, the security vehicle still makes unending noises with the siren, and flashing all sorts of lights on the vehicles in front.

It gets so annoying that one time I almost didn’t give way to an ambulance, a vehicle we really, really should give way to.  Yet, these escort vehicles keep doing it, trying to get whoever they’re escorting just a few minutes faster to wherever the destination is. Just yesterday I saw a 3-car entourage with a police car in front and the black X-Trail at the back, doing its noise and light thing, trying to get through Sudirman traffic – the drivers in front of the entourage wouldn’t have been able to give way even if they wanted to, since the 2-lane road had already been overtaken by 3 lanes of traffic.

So, save us some irritation and use the energy to try to solve the actual traffic problem, eh boys?

This morning, in the usual traffic jam in Kemang, I almost hit a motorcycle when moving forward as the motorcyclist simply cut me off and went on his way. As a good Jakartan I gave several honks of protest, but apparently the motorcyclist was annoyed by the noise.

He opened his visor, turned back and said something – I couldn’t hear what he was saying as I was in the car, the windows were all up and the stereo was on. But of course, that didn’t stop him from his string of what I assume were expletives, accompanied with various rude hand gestures, which went on until he was far from my car. 

A friend once told me if I ever was in a minor traffic accident – fender bender, small dent and so on – we should always try to get the upper hand in acting angry, whoever was at fault. So even though the motorcyclist was at fault, he’ll never admit he’s wrong.

And that, is a typical day in Jakarta…

Activists have pointed out, yet again, that from mismanagement of traffic and public transport, Jakarta will be in a total gridlock by 2014. This would be caused by a mix of new vehicle sales, bad traffic management and chaotic public transport services. Thus, creating the world’s biggest parking lot, bar none (except if the world really does end in 2012 like the Mayans say).

Somebody needs to do something about this. For all the buzz in the news, the MRT project will remain for me a figment of the imagination until I see it running before my eyes, as I have been traumatized by the failure of the monorail project. The only way that Jakarta can get its citizens to abandon daily use of private vehicles is to have the vision of creating a public transport network that is efficient, far-reaching (right into the congested suburbs and satellite towns), secure (from pickpockets, at least), safe and reliable. None of the above can be said about any mode of public transport right now. Proof? From various areas in Jakarta, it actually takes longer to travel from one point to another by public transport than it does with a private vehicle. Considering Jakartan’s obsession with speed, no wonder they prefer their souped-up motorcycles.

In Bogor, not only the people work in shifts at some factories, the public transport minivans will too. Bogor has notoriously been a spectacle for traffic jams, for these green or blue minivans are practically everywhere, on any road and probably stopping to wait for passengers. To add to that, these minivans seem to forget that there are other cars using the road, because they stop anywhere – even the middle of the road – to get or disembark passengers. There’s even some sections of the town that are somehow allocated for a full 12-hour traffic jam for these minivans to wait for their passengers, eating up to three lanes and leaving only one lane passable for other cars.

A Bogor official was quoted “It won’t be minivans waiting for passengers anymore, but the other way around”. Makes you think – how did Bogor get so many minivans in the first place, for such a small town?

Seeing that coincidentally Valentine’s Day this year fell on a Saturday, various venues and companies created Valentine events to attract people to come and ‘celebrate’ Valentine’s at their place or event (even I am guilty of coming to one of the numerous Valentine events held yesterday). Which is all fine and lovely, except to certain people who think Valentine’s Day is either not in line with Indonesian culture or with their religion, as Valentine’s is either a Western capitalist apparatus or a Christian celebration. But I think those arguments are beyond this website… so anyway.

What do you get when you hold sooo many events in one day, on a Saturday night? This.

So hope you enjoyed your Valentine’s Day in your cars

So Jakarta, happy Valentine’s Day, we only bitch so much because we love you!

Finally ‘experts’, whoever they are, are saying the new school hours are not effective in decreasing traffic congestion. Well, you don’t really need to be an expert to judge that, seeing as that only 1 week after the new rule, traffic was as bad as always (perhaps worse).

Some supposedly important guy from the Secondary and Higher Education Agency says children need to adapt. The morning air is fresh, so that the students can concentrate better, thus increasing the quality of education. This guy must be really old to forget how hard it is to think in the morning in a 7 am class to understand derivatives and logarithms, let alone 6.30.

So now the kids have to get up at 4 am to go to school, and have to go to bed by 8 pm for enough sleep. Meanwhile, the parents leave home at 7 am, and reach home at 8 pm. So, goodbye, quality time with family, at least my kids can breath fresh air and concentrate better in the morning, and there are less traffic jams. Oh… none of that actually happened?

Even the non-obligatory new office hours don’t do anything to help. Let’s see what other bright ideas will come along later…

Truk Pecah Ban, Tol Dalam Kota Tersendat

This is only one instance of traffic accidents related to buses or trucks, at any given week. You’d think heavy-use high-performance vehicles would have better maintenance, right?

(Originally posted by City Gal on Nov 17, 2005)

Hm…

As for many Jakartan motorists, motorcycles and their riders are the bane of existence – including fellow motorcyclists. Check these points and tell me if I missed anything:

• riding without a helmet
• riding with more than 2 people on board
• riding at night without turning the lights on
• going against red lights
• going against one-way roads
• although still waiting for the red light, but strategically positioned beyond the red light line mark
• riding on the pavement
• making all sorts of noises for no apparent reason (horns and mufflers included)
• unnecessary speeding
• revving up the engine for no apparent reason
• filling up any empty space possible
• never stopping for pedestrians
• never can wait in line – has to go ahead of everyone
• carrying all sorts of stuff while riding a motorcycle – 50 kg bag of rice, 2×4 m wood panel, washing machine, 10 m steel rods, television, computer, home aircon, 24 live chickens, and so on

Did at some point motorcyles get written out of the traffic laws?

Whether on the road, in line at the checkout counter, or queuing up for a Transjakarta ticket, or even waiting for the bus to arrive after you bought said Transjakarta ticket, a lot of Jakartans have a knack of cutting lines.
Even in heavy traffic the guy behind you (plus five motorcycles) always try to overtake you, even though they can see a mikrolet slowing everybody down. They utilize every light and sound tool at their disposal until they can overtake one car, then start the whole process again… and I won’t even start about the ‘cars with sirens’ (which will be relegated to another post).

Then there’s the mother of three who in the middle of taking care of her two trolleys of groceries and her hyperactive children, she still manages to jump in line in front of you at the checkout counter when you’re considering buying batteries or chocolate (I’ll take the chocolate, thanks). If you start to give her the look she just ignores you because she’s so busy with her affairs. There’s also the chick who only has to buy lipstick or tampons and just gives a short smile while cutting the line in front of you while saying ‘boleh duluan ya’. Yeah whatever! I can wait here until the cashier actually comes to me.

I myself even had an incident when in line for a Transjakarta ticket. The line was only 2 people long but this guy still cut in straight to the ticket counter, all smiles, leaning in just a bit to give money to the cashier. I said ‘Mas, antre dong mas’ and he only smiled apologetically while waving his hand to me. Tempers rised, but I didn’t say anything – yet. I just kept staring at him, dumbfounded by the lack of…. too many to mention, but when he noticed I was still staring at him he said ‘nggak usah pake marah dong’. Eh? You cut in my line, don’t even pretend to be sorry, don’t even know that it’s supposed to be wrong or at least improper, and I’m not supposed to be angry? So I said to him ‘emang kenapa kalau marah???’ while passing him. I was too pissed to actually make a fuss about it, so I ignored him all the way to my bus stop.

And I think everybody has a story of waiting in line to actually get into the bus. Even if some people actually try to make a proper line, there will always be some person who comes in the bus stop and just walks over to the access door. Then another. Then another. And another…. and their friends. So by the time the bus actually stops by, the line is screwed big time, and it’s every man for himself! Feet will be trodden, elbows will fly and the bus conductor will try (and fail) to organize the mob entering his bus. And when every does get in, everybody stays standing near the doors! As if there’s no other place to stand, even if there are empty seats at the end. So the mobbing happens again at the next bus stop…

Then there’s always the motorcycle or car which always tries to push ahead in gridlocked traffic, even though it’s actually people like them who made the gridlock in the first place. And utter chaos ensues, and even more chaos as if the traffic is stuck, the more likely people will honk their horns in frustration (or even absent-minded relfex to honk if the vehicle in front of you is not moving).

Surely a modern society like Jakarta can learn to wait in line properly? Plis dehhhhh…..

Tags: busway, transjakarta, antri, macet, traffic

Pernah nggak, lagi di lampu merah, beberapa dari peristiwa ini terjadi:

1. mobil belakang klakson-klakson padahal mobil depan belom jalan
2. mobil belakang klakson-klakson dan main lampu dim padahal mobile depan belom jalan
3. motor-motor sebelah kiri dan kanan klakson berkali-kali saat lampu kuning ke hijau (belum hijau ya)
4. ada pengamen atau pengemis lagi berdiri tengah jalan tanpa usaha minggir padahal lampunya sudah hijau
5. ada pengamen atau pengemis lagi berdiri tengah jalan tanpa usaha minggir padahal lampunya sudah hijau, dan mobil-mobil dan motor-motor di sekitar sudah berisik
6. bis depan masih ngambil atau nurunin penumpang padahal lampu hijau
7. bis depan masih ngambil atau nurunin penumpang padahal lampu hijau dan mobil-mobil dan motor-motor di sekitar sudah berisik
8. ada yang masih maksa nyeberang jalan padahal lampu sudah hijau
9. lampu belum hijau tapi mobil-mobil dan motor-motor belakang memaksa untuk maju terus karena ‘biasanya’ jalan terus aja
10. baru mau maju pas lampu hijau ada motor-motor yang masih berusaha menerobos, kadang-kadang diikuti angkutan umum
11. pas lampu merah, ada beberapa motor berusaha menunggu di depan garis batas

atau ada kejadian lain? let me know.

So what else is new. There are so many student or union demonstrations today, a lot of the time we don’t even care what they’re trying to say! Try to swallow the amount of demos scheduled today in this article. Paling tidak sekarang kalau demo ada jalur hukumnya, supaya teratur dan tidak mengganggu lalu lintas pada umumnya… at least secara teori. Kenyataannya tetep macet, toh? Dan keliatan dari daftar demo ini, informasi yang ingin diketahui orang banyak itu tentang jam, lokasi, bentuk kegiatan. Mungkin ada yang peduli siapa yang demo, jadi ditulis juga. Tapi apa yang didemokan….

Ayo, demo hari ini tentang apa?

Pliss dehh…

Yang namanya demo di Jakarta udah jamak banget ya… demo masak, demo pembersih lantai, sampai demo kenaikan BBM. Dan demo-demo yang lain, yang sepertinya harus berlokasi di daerah Bunderan HI, depan MPR/DPR, Sudirman/Thamrin, dan sesekali di depan salah satu kedutaan.

Pasti ada aja yang diprotes… kalo protes harga-harga naik, masih OK lah, walaupun sebenernya kan pasar kita udah market-oriented economy, jadi harga-harga sebenarnya ditentukan pasar, bukan pemerintah. Jadi protes ke siapa? Mau balik ke jaman pemerintah ngatur semuanya? Ga mau juga kan. Ada juga protes anti-pornografi dan pornoaksi….. and at the same time, some guy selling tabloids on a side street near the location is selling tabloids which are on the verge of pornography.

There’s also the time where a certain religion-oriented so-called defense front (I think you all know what I’m talking about) mobbed an embassy because said embassy’s country had buildings and murals that offended their religion. Dudes, get a life! Masih banyak yang bisa diurusin selain mendemo sebuah bangunan yang bahkan kita nggak pernah liat.

Dan pasti sekali sebulan mahasiswa turun ke jalan memprotes pemerintah, how bad they are working, bahwa pemerintah harus turun karena harga BBM mau naik atau apalah. With no real solution as to what happens after that.

And the one thing about these demonstrations for all travelling Jakartans – MACET! When’s the last time we even remembered what today’s demonstration was about? It used to make a big statement – now everyone who wants to be heard instantly thinks they should just drag some people to Bunderan HI and bam! National statement, televised.

Whatever the cause, you really need to find some other way to communicate (maybe write a blog, guys?), because it’s just not working anymore. It only makes the city more gridlocked than it already is…

Ujung-ujungnya complain gue cuma satu: demo bikin macet, dan jadinya banyak orang ga peduli juga demonya ngomongin apa.

Plis deh….